How to Care for Your Au Pair Without Over-Controlling Their Social Life

This post is also available in: Deutsch (German)

Inviting an Au Pair into your home means placing trust not only in them to care for your children but also in how they spend their free time. It’s essential to strike a balance between showing care and respecting their independence.

Some Host Families can become overly controlling, wanting to know every detail about their Au Pair’s social life. For example, they may text whenever the Au Pair leaves the house or constantly monitor where they go. While it’s reasonable for parents to ensure their car is in a safe neighborhood, some families take it too far by using tracking apps like “Find My Phone” or geo-trackers. This level of control can significantly infringe on the Au Pair’s privacy and freedom.

While it’s important for Host Families to ensure their Au Pair stays safe, it’s equally important to be non-invasive to avoid making them feel uncomfortable. Here are some non-intrusive ways to care for your Au Pair:

Non-Invasive Ways to Look After Your Au Pair’s Safety

1. Set a Car Curfew: You can ask your Au Pair to return the family car by a specific hour, even if they don’t have to be home at that time. On weekends, allow them to make their own plans while maintaining the car curfew.

2. Provide a List of Safe Neighborhoods: Instead of restricting your Au Pair from going to certain areas, offer guidance on which neighborhoods are safer. Encourage them to notify you if they plan to visit potentially less safe areas.

3. Collect Emergency Contact Information: Ask your Au Pair for the phone numbers of their friends or anyone they’re spending time with. This way, in case of an emergency, you have reliable contacts to reach out to.

4. Set Clear but Flexible Rules: You can establish general rules, like curfews or car usage policies, but remember that their free time is their own. Avoid creating an overly strict environment that might make your Au Pair feel like they’re constantly under surveillance.

By following these tips, you can ensure that your Au Pair feels supported and respected while also keeping their safety in mind.

How do you manage your Au Pair’s social life and safety? Share your tips in the comments!